And...My World Spins Around Him.

Do you notice spider webs on my blog?  Hehehe. 

Motherhood is not easy!  Whoooaaa…what a bold introduction.  Hahaha. But, I think anyone who has gone through the experience of being a mother knows what I mean…and perhaps agree with me.

 Every morning I woke up by the sound of my baby’s sound.  Either he is crying, giggling or simply a calm ‘aaahhh ooohh’ing (the only sound/words he knows now).  Then my daily routine began.  I will play with him for a while before preparing breakfast (a fast one) for my husband and me.  Then, after my husband bath him, I ‘groom’ him for the day and then feed him.  Sometimes he fell asleep straight away, but most of the time he needs a good cuddle and my silly lullaby to sleep. 

Then after taking breakfast with my husband and he go to work, I try to do all the house chores.  House cleaning, laundry, cooking for lunch and all that I have to do fast and quietly.  If I am lucky and he is in a good ‘mood’, I will be able to complete all the house chores before he woke up.  Or..there are times he being a sweet baby, that even though he is awake, he will let me do the house chores without crying for attention.  If it’s the other way round, all the house chores have to wait till evening…night..or the day after.

The only time he will let me rest is night time.  He is a sound sleeper at night provided he is in his regular mood.  After feeding him at 7 or 8pm, he usually will sleep until midnight.  Wake up for feeding, and after a short lullaby he will sleep soundly till dawn.  So, the only time I have for myself is from dusk to midnight.  That is the only time I could do what I like.  But by that time, I would be so exhausted and just capable of watching tv, or facebooking..or simply take time to sleep.  After all, his mood is unpredictable. He might be a sound sleeper from dusk to midnight…but wide awake and crying for attention at midnight to dawn. There is no way I could predict.

It’s been 3 months since the first time I heard his first cry.  And since then, my world spins around him.  He demanded all my attention, ….my time…my rest..my sleep and my love of course.  There are times,  I really miss the things that I love to do before.  Books, poetry, photoshop..baking and so on.  But, I really has no time for all that now.  I don’t even have much time for blogging anymore. That explains ‘spider web’ on my blog. I wonder how, some of the friends I know..a wife and a mother, still could finish reading a few story book in a month.  Whoever you are, if you fit the description above….You really amazed me! 

Sounds like complaining am I?  Well…I am not! I am just trying to share how being a mother changed my routine, my life and also…some of my inner strength.  My baby considered a not fussy one (compare to some I know). But fussy or not, they still trying our patient and suck up our energy.  There are times I feel so tired and stressful…and I feel like I could not take it anymore.  But, when I look at his innocent face..my heart fills with love and that love alone push me beyond my limit of my strength and my capability to ease whatever that make him cry and give him all the love I could give in this world.

Motherhood is 24/7 job.  No matter how tiring and challenging it is…there is no such thing as OFF DAY from being a mother.  We might not being paid financially for that responsibility…but it’s ok.  A new lullaby that been created naturally, being able to stop him cry and to stand the pain of back and arms in order to comfort him are a great achievement. And how about each milestone of development he shows and the smile that brightened your universe?  Aren’t it the sweet reward for an exhausted mother?  So, I tell myself…hang on there and don’t give up.  One day you will be rewarded by his hugs, gratitude and unconditional love…hopefully.  So..to all mothers out there who has the same struggle like me in the past…this moment or in the future…..Big Applause and Cheerssssss to you!

Let me share some of the latest picture of my baby.  He is 3 months plus now and weigh about 5kg++.